1.
On the Iberia hopper flight from Palma to Mahón in Menorca, there is a guy in his thirties, wearing a low-key outfit of T-shirt, shorts and sneakers but carrying perhaps the nicest carry-on bag that I’ve ever seen. A black leather beauty. I spot the mark of the luxury house that made it. I do a nosey Google. It’s yours for €72,000. Meanwhile, on the tarmac, he has a platoon of suitcases lined up, all from the same maker. I have a momentary flash of desire (for the bags, not the bag carrier). Then I remember the time that I left my suitcase on a train, another where it arrived on the carousel looking like it had been punched in the face by Mike Tyson. Suddenly his collection seems like anxiety on wheels. I’d better stick with ribbed and metal.
2.
Oh, yes, after all these years of life in Palma, I finally lost my Menorca virginity this week. And thank you for asking, it all went very nicely. I am definitely going back for more.
3.
We stayed on the west of the island in the town of Ciutadella in the Faustino Gran hotel. It’s French-owned, part of the Relais & Châteaux collection. It feels at ease with itself and you don’t sense that staff are following a script. It also has a brilliant concierge service – tables were booked, quiet beaches marked on paper maps. And, no, they didn’t have a clue that I was from Monocle. Just good service and a GM who went out of her way to say hello to everyone.
4.
I am happy with my nationality but on holiday I prefer not to be surrounded by Brits. Over breakfast, by the pool, I don’t want to tune in to conversations about the banalities of my fellow countrymen’s lives (and I definitely don’t want them to hear mine). I want to feel that I am away. Luckily, in Menorca, it seems as though every visitor is French, Italian or American. It’s a safe space.
5.
Friends from Madrid invite us for drinks at their apartment on the north coast, sitting on a bay not far from the town of Fornells. They book a nearby chiringuito for dinner but just after the starters arrive, the power goes out. And stays out. The kitchen will have to close. It doesn’t seem to faze anyone. Candles are produced, wine drunk, children continue playing. Our hosts nip home and return with a tub of ice-cream and a Santa & Cole table lamp. We just carry on laughing and talking in the dark.
6.
You know that you’re hitched to the right person when it’s 36C and, while you could be going for a swim, your partner agrees that it would be fun to visit Lithica, an abandoned stone quarry that’s now also part artwork, complete with a huge stone maze. We bake in the heat and agree that it’s one of the trip’s highlights, even if we exit feeling cooked to perfection.
7.
Late to the party, perhaps, we also got to visit Isla del Rey, the island in Mahón harbour that was once a naval hospital but is now home to a Hauser & Wirth gallery and its Cantina restaurant. Is it bad that I enjoyed the Piet Oudolf-designed garden more than the art?
8.
Friends’ recommendations. My chiringuito host Pablo gave us a great list of Menorca places to visit and so did my Madrid pals Ale and Moy. In their concise lists there are so many gems. I might have to enlist all of them when we add Menorca to our travel guides. That’s the vibe we are going for at Monocle – telling you about the sort of places that a friend would take you to.
9.
So many nice spots to eat at, shops and galleries to see. I’ll share one. A table for two at Ulisses, which is next to the market in Ciutadella. Sublime sushi, fish caught that morning by the restaurant’s boat. A night slips slowly by.
10.
We got back to Palma in time to see the eclipse and it was worth it. There were so many stories about the island going into lockdown, about how Mallorca would be overcrowded with eclipse watchers. We ended up on a beach, sitting on a rock, surrounded by nice people. And at the moment of totality, people clapped and cheered. The universe amazed us. Or was it just the power going out again?
